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We are all entitled to our own opinions, but we're not entitled to our own facts. To combat this, the role of UNBIASED journalism is critically important. Unfortunately, I think too many in the legacy corporate media, for the purposes of profit and ratings, are the conflict entrepreneurs that Ms Henley described.

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the media has been so insanely weaponized!, which in turn gave rise to things like this. my dad and I were lamenting the other day about how we had to turn of BBC about 5 years ago because it became inexcusable propaganda and how we used to love listening to radio 4 30 years ago.....

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I've been having more and more of these types of "high conflict" conversations with people I'm ordinarily pretty close with. And it's tiring, Amanda is right. I've lost some friends to it. I have to keep reminding myself that I have much more in common with these people, or even people in general, than I do in opposition. And if I seek that commonality, the differences that are being amplified by current events seem to shrink. As others in the comments have mentioned, getting off of social media to have engaged, 1-on-1 conversations is key. Put the humanity back in relationships, leave tech out of that space if you're trying to heal and bond especially.

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I think you are right. I would add, though, that there are some people, like me, who are immuo-suppressed and have seen that some of the people in their circle would rather convenience over their own friend's life. How do you look past that kind of selfishness?

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All I ask in response to this statement is that you look at actual evidence that unvaccinated people are more threatening to your immunocompromised state than the vaccinated, as both spread the virus equally. The article points out that the different “sides” are operating from a different set of information and beliefs about what is going on. One needs to constantly question what one assumes to be fact or truth. At least look objectively and fair-mindedly at both sides of the debate.

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I don't believe I mentioned anything about vaccination status. What I did mention is that there is widespread belief among the impatient that human life has relatively low value. It's more a sign of low resiliency. Look up the psychological experiment called The Marshmallow Test. It's applicable to more and more who use their fancy degrees to validate their impatient natures.

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The article is about being curious, and I am very curious about who you are referring to as the “impatient” and how these people potentially impact your immunocompromised state. I truly do not understand your comment, especially when you say it has nothing to do with vaccination status.

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As I said, the impatient (for me) are some people in my own circle.

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February 17, 2022Edited
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No, I'm saying you like to jump to conclusions ... based on nothing. I will say you have poor impulse control. Take a breath before you respond?

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Just as a side-point, the Marshmallow Test seems to be non-reproducible and seems to have very limited predictive power. I must confess that I was disappointed when I learned this as I felt the experiment was neat an very explanatory!

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February 17, 2022
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No. Perhaps reading what's actually there and reacting less to triggers would promote understanding. You're bringing your baggage by reading between the lines. Maybe I'm a commie too because I'm gay? Hmmm.

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February 17, 2022
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February 17, 2022Edited
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Great points. So hard not to get the urge to defend oneself (against ignorance) but it’s usually to no end anyways.

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May I suggest that you won’t have to look past “that kind of selfishness” once you examine the premise of your philosophy that asserts that selfishness (i.e. man’s right to live for his own happiness) is necessarily immoral. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness applies to the individual, not the collective. No man is born into this world with his freedom mortgaged to another individual.

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Jack - the immunocompromised are always at risk, from the flu, C. difficile, pneumonia causing bugs, etc. Are you proposing we shut down society indefinitely to protect them?

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I am curious: I wonder what these people have done that feels selfish to you? I have a friend who is immunocompromised, as is one of her daughters. Not so much that they both don’t go out and about, or to school, or all that—but still call themselves immune compromised. This friend decided not to allow her daughter over to my house anymore, because we are not vaccinated. Her daughter also reminds mine to social distance from her. This “friend” tried to have a convo with me about my views (I don’t want the vax for a variety of reasons, that’s all) and implied I was selfish, I did not care about the “collective”. When I suggested we keep the convo up in real life on a walk she declined my offer. Next I heard her eldest vaxxed daughter brought covid home to all of them! My vaxxed bf did the same. (We were all sick for 1-4 days, him being the sickest!) If someone like her refuses to listen to the science, refuses to pay attention to what is actually going on around her, it becomes harder and harder to stay curious. It feels completely irrational. Your comment reminds me of this story, but you didn’t say quite enough, so I am asking what you mean by “selfish”.

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I think those most vulnerable have an obligation to take whatever precautions they can, and those close to them can help by taking *effective* measures that could add to their safety. Beyond that, I think it's a false premise to impose morality (i.e. selfishness) on a highly transmissible airbourne virus, for which most of the recently attempted interventions (e.g., masking, social distancing, etc.) have produced little to no useful result.

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No one should be obligated to make health decisions for themselves based on the health needs of others…that’s not selfish. Take care of yourself, that’s all you need to worry about 😊

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Excellent article.

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All I can say to help is: meet the one you wish to talk to personally or using audio plus video alive. Do not use social media to convey your thoughts. You will be way more respectful and feel more connected to the other person, which can be your colleague or your son!

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Thank you for this. What I've been doing is looking at past events in Canada to put this into perspective. BC 1983, the awful labor disputes of the 70's, the three elections Duplessis won between revoking a liquor license and the Supreme Court decision holding him personally liable. I see individuals in the indigenous community rising above their awful circumstances and laying the groundwork for their communities to piece themselves back together. I see people like you that walk away from the corrupt and smothering institutions that thrive on division and hate.

This is a new generation being handed a basically working country and figuring out a way to make it work, mostly by making mistake after mistake, just as their parents and grandparents did.

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Thank you Tara,

My husband and I were just discussing how to move forward with colleagues and family members who seem so enraged by our position that our government has over reached. The emergency measures debate had to be turned off in our home this am. We cannot believe what is happening. We read your timely interview and appreciate the advice. In our opinion, every Canadian citizen ought to consider this invoking of emergency measures seperately from personal opinions about mandates and vaccines. Don't get caught up in the us vs. them divisive game. Our charter of rights and freedoms is the only story. Protecting it should unite us all.

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February 17, 2022Edited
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Could not agree with you more! This is why Trudeau is stoking hate- trying to distract everyone.

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I think the problem is that the Federal Liberal party and the Prime Minister are conflict entrepreneurs. They passed the mandates to create a wedge issue to use against the Conservatives. They ran an election hoping to win on Covid. Every single thing Trudeau has done has been appealing to his base at the expense of the millions of ordinary people he first insulted and is now bankrupting and intimidating by seizing their assets without any judicial oversight.

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Exactly. Their base wanted civil war and the Liberals delivered.

“White liberals are those who have perfected the art of selling themselves to the black man as our ‘friend’ to get our sympathy, our allegiance and our minds. The white liberal attempts to use us politically against white conservatives, so that anything the black man does is never for his own good, never for his advancement, never for his own progress, he’s only a pawn in the hands of the white liberal.”

Malcolm X

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I am so glad I'm off FB now, best decision I w er made. I can just imagine how many friendships would be ruined by now.

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Government's and politicians like to divide and conquer. It is a tried and true ploy that has helped politicians keep their voter base even if the voters don't really want to vote for them. That is how they keep control of people. You vote for this or that.

They call it strategic voting.

The problem with strategic voting is that it keeps the bad parties in power. You vote out one bad party for a perceived lesser evil.

The problem with the lesser evil is that it plays into the hands of the psychological manipulation in which the political parties use to strike fear into the voting public.

I never vote for this or that. I look at what I believe in and if that means voting for an independent, so be it. The cards will fall where they fall.

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With my conflict started when lies were told and the Courts got involved and carried on to this day!

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This is an amazing article. I am so grateful to have read it and it makes me feel like there are things that I can do to more fully understand the current situation better. Thank you

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Being insanely curious in an environment where any of your fire starters exist is like leaving the propane running... you won't be allowed to be curious for long. Curious to know how she would propose one would keep themselves safe and retain their values in these environments.

(From someone who is insanely curious 24/7 and has uncovered ungodly amounts of fraud, corruption, and blackmail in high places and paid dearly for it.)

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This is exactly what happened in the US if you voted for Trump. Families and friendships ruined over differences in political beliefs. The same rhetoric too: the truckers are misogynistic and racist and so were the Trump voters. This was constantly stoked by the legacy media and the politicians, and it still is in the US. I heard the Attorney General of Canada make a reference to “pro-Trump supporters” helping to find the truckers, and how this may be illegal. I never thought that I would see this happen in Canada, but there it is. It seems that the same class war exists strongly in both countries.

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With my conflict the Government took my Mothers WILL then they took my Accident monies and finally they sold the house I was born in and was handed down through my family by dispensing my name off the title. So now that I lost two jobs fighting for the truth and no home to live in. This will be happening to more people every day. Slowly but surely!

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Excellent article, thank you! I have consciously moved more towards Buddhist teachings and practice in order to stay sane in this situation of extreme polarization of views. That means constantly letting go of fixed positions and tuning in to the greater field of love, unity, and beauty that is there for all of us always. It doesn’t mean avoiding what’s going on but rather choosing to engage in a way that promotes peace and equanimity rather than fuels the conflict. It also doesn’t mean I don’t get angry, outraged, and reactive. But I try to encompass these difficult feelings within a larger human and spiritual frame. It’s my way of getting “untrapped” in this seemingly impossible situation.

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